I forgot to post a current picture so there it is. I may post one in natural light as well.
I am writing this as I just finished watching the movie Labor Day (2013). This movie is about a young boy and his mother and their time spent with a man over the Labor Day weekend. It stars Kate Winslet, Josh Brolin, and Gattlin Griffith. Kate plays a divorced single mom named Adele and while out shopping with her son Henry, they meet a man named Frank played by Josh Brolin. Frank recently escaped from prison and he asked for their help to get further out-of-town.
I love this movie. I didn’t know what to expect. I thought it would be suspenseful and I might need to hide behind a pillow, but it was far from that. This was a family love story. The story is being told by the son as an adult played by Tobey Maguire. Throughout the movie you see flashes of the past which seems a little confusing. Later it becomes clear that it is the story of what Frank was accused. Murder. I won’t give the details, but it was surprising. I’m not sure it was important to the movie, but it did help you understand that he really was a good guy.
This movie reminds me of my mom or Adele. Adele was in love with love. Life happens and the sadness gets worse. During this weekend Adele finds love again with Frank and they become a family, but this quickly ends once it is discovered that he is with them. Frank goes back to jail for about 20 years. Henry grows up to be a wonderful young man because of the influence that Frank has had on his life over the holiday weekend. In the end Frank gets out and is reunited with Adele.
I watched this movie on Netflix (this is not a sponsored post) and I gave it 5 stars. If you haven’t seen it already and you love, love stories I highly recommend it.
i think for most people birthdays were very special when they were growing up. then you become an adult and for some of us birthdays mean less and less as the years go by. that is how i feel, but life is what you make it right? as a kid when our birthday came around we had cake and ice cream. this wasn’t something that we had all the time so i was excited for my birthday just to have that lovely combination. the special birthday boy or girl go to pick out the cake and ice cream flavor. i always got chocolate cake and neopolitan ice cream. those really were happy days. now for my birthday i rarely do anything. i take off from work. i’ll usually go to the movies and maybe out to each with my sisters. two years ago i went to chicago for the first time for my birthday. that was really fun. this year i did nothing again. after going to chicago the year before it was really boring staying local. i did do some shopping and i went the casino. that was low fun and not high big fun like chicago. next year i think i will go to new york or the beach. i am itching to put my toes into some beautiful soft sand and clear blue waters. im waiting to lose weight so i can enjoy the beach in some type of swimwear. whether i do that or not…i’m going to the beach.
not really, but the last two days #writing101 assignments weren’t my cup of tea. interesting ideas, but i could not think of anything. i am going to write about anything. the point is to just write and get into the habit of writing daily. i wish i wrote yesterday, but that day is gone so there is nothing i can do about it now. that is why i am here today.
if you remember my last post i said i would track people i meet and the conversation. i’m a little scared to do that. put myself out there. i haven’t had any real conversations with anyone new. nothing on tuesday and on wednesday a lady said to me “hello beautiful black queen” which put a smile on my face, but i didn’t stop to talk to her. i am a shy person and though i am not as shy as i used to be i still don’t talk to strangers.
this is me all day lol. so i get a lot of people telling me to smile or trying to get me to smile. it’s not that i don’t want to smile i just don’t. i’m usually in my head thinking about something. i’m in the zone and not paying any attention to whether i am smiling or not. sometimes i try to think “smile” and then i can feel the smile on my face, but then i stop thinking it and it disappears.
lesson learned: if you don’t smile people will tell you that you are beautiful to make you smile.
the most interesting person i’ve met this year…i haven’t met very many people. nothing was wrong with them, but to say they were interesting. i don’t know about that. you know what would be interesting? to keep track of all the people you meet in a year. i don’t think i meet that many people, but you never know unless you think about it. it would be interesting that everytime you met someone face to face, greeted, and had even a brief conversation how many people would that be. you may not learn their name, but they could still make a difference in your life. some little thing they said could make you think or behave differently, but hopefully in a positive way. face to face interactions don’t happen often anymore. we cram into elevators and public transportation all while staring at the tiny screens in front of us. i rarely do that because of motion sickness so i end up looking out the window or watching the numbers in the elevator.
i can’t beleive i’m going to do this, but i will keep track of everyone i meet for the next 365 days. i will post it on my blog and tag it #whoimettoday. i may not meet someone everyday, but when i do i will report it here. i will not intentially solicite a conversation (that’s not my personality). i will let it happen naturally. i will not post names of the people. just the conversation and if i learned anything. i hope you enjoy this series and maybe will take on the challenge yourself.
Writing 101, Day Five: Be Brief
You stumble upon a random letter on the path. You read it. It affects you deeply, and you wish it could be returned to the person to which it’s addressed. Write a story about this encounter.
Today’s twist: Approach this post in as few words as possible.
as i finished reading the letter my mind filled with thousands of thoughts and questions. not about the author or the person they wrote to, but the message. they lived a life of regret and only wanted to share that with this person. they hoped to prevent them from doing the same. though i may try i may never get this letter to the intended recipient, but it has helped me to no live in regret. i feel more determined to take risk and try at life. we often dream or think of goals we want to achieve, but never take any actions. i will take action and not grow old with regret.
i mentioned previously that i lost 75 pounds about 6 or 7 years ago. after the loss of close friends and family (including my mom) i gave up on being healthy. i lost the why.
i did weight watchers from october of last year to april of this year. i cancelled my membership because although i learned a lot i wasn’t doing the work. i no longer wanted to pay to lose 5lbs gain 2 then lose 3 and gain 4. i was tired of the cycle and decided to stop. one thing that we were asked often was why we wanted to lose. i could always find reasons why, but in my heart there was no reason or i wasn’t being honest about it.
to be healthy
to be an example for my family
to develop healthy habits so my future kids will have healthy habits
to wear cute clothes
to be skinny
to be accepted
i think the last one was more on the nose. i’ve always felt awkward growing up. i felt different. i know we are all different, but it seemed more noticable to me. now being an adult i feel to fit in is to be smaller. just about everyone it seems is small. at work at least. i feel like the giant blob. the literal elephant in the room. those reason above are reason why i want to lose weight, but i’m not sure in my heart it’s there. i want to live. i know losing the weight and getting rid of my high blood pressure will aid in that. i want to have children and a healthy weight will make that more of a reality too.
part of a healthy lifestyle is about loving yourself. you begin to love yourself enough to do what it needs to be healthy. i’m trying to love myself more. probably another thing i lost. i’m not sure i loved myself so much to begin with, but it got worse over time. the most important thing is to love you first. care for you first. then you can do for others.
hm the three most important songs in my life? is that possible? i enjoy music, but i never thought of a song to mean so much to me that it was important. if i was married then i guess the first song my hubs and i dance to would be important, but that’s it. i do have some favorites.
i will always love these two songs. janet jacksons pleasure principle and anita bakers no one in the world. i was so young when these songs came out, but for some reason they spoke to me. they spoke to the quiet girl inside who wants to speak up for herself. janet jackson’s pleasure principle is from the control album in 1986. i was only 6 years old. what does a 6 year old know about pleasure lol. not a thing. well not janet’s type of pleasure lol. pleasure principle was about love or having the right love. ending it with someone because there was a lack of pleasure.
anita baker’s no one in the world was more about the video than the song. i love the song but what did i know about love? not a thing. no oen in he wrold is also from 1986 on the rapture album. you know what in 1986 my parents divorced. maybe i was searching for answers to love through music lol. anyways the video to this song is so me. it starts out with anita being dragged to an apollo type performance. she is shy and timid. she almost refuses to perform out of fear of being struck by a bow an arrow. just before it’s too late her confidence sky rockets and she wows the crowd. the song is beautiful, but i often fill like the timid anita at the beginning of the video. i haven’t hit my wave of confidence yet. i am in toastmasters which has helpled tremediously in building my confidence, but i am far from wanting to sing in public. i love to sing. i love harmony, but my best performances are in the bathroom lol. one day i will venture into the bedroom and sing like i do in the bathroom. not sure when that will be.
i guess they are a little important to me. i relate to those songs in ways the artists probably didn’t expect.
saturday morning sleep in bed. the sun slips through the blinds that cover the window. the sound of the lawn mower wakes me and the sun greets me hello.
i loved my bedroom growing up. it wasn’t the biggest, but it had a nice big window that let in the morning sun. it also had burgular bars. i grew up in the hood, but it never felt like it. my mom always made sure we were safe and we were. my room was my happy place. it was were i played with my barbie dream house (used, but loved), we played ship on rainy days, and where i would color for hours. i think about my room often because its where my imagination thrived. it’s where i was able to be myself.
when i buy my home it must have good natural light and my bedroom must get the morning sun.
for the next 20 days i will be writing random post. i’m trying to develop the habit of posting more often and this challenge provided by wordpress is what i will be using to help me. below is day 1. thanks for reading.
feeling frustrated and stuck. i don’t really want to write about negative things. we have enough of that in our personal lives that no one wants to read about it on a blog, but as a lifestyle blogger that is what is going on in my life. a bf who i am not sure is being genuine. he could be using me like he has others. though he is trying to do better i still pull most of the weight. speaking of weight i’m trying to lose some. more than some. about 5 or 6 years ago i lost 75lbs. my doctor told me i was morbidly obese and i had high cholesterol. i changed my eating habits and started walking. after the loss of a coworker who became my friend, two grandmothers, and my mom i gained the weight back. i’ve lost all drive for life and struggle to get it back. i moved away from home which may not have helped, but i at times enjoy my new surroundings. i find myself constantly doing for others or what others need/expect of me. i feel guilty for thinking of myself. i don’t like my job since they made me change roles, but i’m not 100% sure what i want to do. i find myself thinking how much i dont want to be my mother instead of just trying to be me. i don’t know who me is other than what i don’t want me to be. i’m not sure how well i am doing at not being what i don’t want to be lol.
i have figured out a little bit about who i want to be. i am working towards becoming vegan. i’ve already cut out a lot of meat and working on dairy. after being in toastmasters i found that i enjoy communicating, having new experiences and sharing what i learn with others. i am going to school for my bachelor of arts in communications. i will be a juinor in july. this will be my first degree and the farthest i have gotten in college. i want to do branding and and be a social media strategist. i love social media and the new and interesting ways to learn about so many things. i sometimes give advice to my sister about her business as far as social media (it’s a new business), but she doesn’t always listen to me. i hope to gain some experience to help businesses that need it. what also started this was i wanted to use some volunteer hours to help with social media for non-profits. most of them wanted someone with SMS experience. i have none, but i really would like to help one day so here i am going to school. i am aslo reading books and researching to learn and gain experience. i have a few other ideas, but i’m not ready to share them yet.